Blue Bombers asked to change their name.

Blue Bombers Name Could Promote Terrorism – Group Wants Name Change

Winnipeg, MB –

A local advocacy group is calling on the Winnipeg Blue Bombers to change the name of the football team to something that does not promote violence and is more sensitive to mental health issues.

“In today’s age of terrorism and bombings we shouldn’t have professional sports teams using such negative terms in their names,” The Organization For Positivity and Light spokesperson Bartley Nevess said.

The demands come during the same week Winnipeg’s Mayor called on the Edmonton Eskimos to drop their racially insensitive name.

“We live in an age where the term bomber conjures up fear and terror,” Nevess explained.  “Even the term blue could be taken as an uninformed term for someone suffering depression and is not appropriate for a sports team.”

“We shouldn’t be contributing to the misconception that mental health is related in any way to terrorism and acts of violence,” Nevess said.  “It’s bad enough the president of the United States blamed acts of terror on mental illness.”

The OPL group is worried that in an age of radicalization, people identifying as “bombers” and cheering for people publicly who call themselves “Bombers” could lead to someone acting out violently.

“We should do everything possible to distance ourselves from becoming, or desiring to become, depressed terrorists,” Nevess shared.  “Tackling issues of mental health are challenging and the issue of terrorism is the fear of our generation.”

Nevess see this as an opportunity to update the branding of the team with a more positive moniker.

“Winnipeg and Manitoba has a lot of amazing things that could be used in coming up with a new name.  Why not the Golden Boys, The Manitoba Flood, Winnipeg Wind or the Winnipeg Freeze.”

CIPP-TV was too lazy to bother contacting the Winnipeg Football Club for comment on this fictional story.

 

Notice to readers/disclaimer – click here to read the full explanation of the satirical and fictional nature of this story and website.  Please read and share responsibly.

Photo Credit:  S Parkhin

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Portage To Change Name To Porridge or Potato la Prairie In Support of Farmers

Portage la Prairie, MB –

Porridge, you’re mom made you eat it when your were a kid, and now the oat industry in Manitoba want to make Portagers call it their hometown.

Likewise, if the Potato Producers of Manitoba Group get their way, Portage will be named after the world’s sexiest vegetable.

The competing proposals put forward at City Hall to have the city re-named to Porridge or Potato la Prairie will offer a boost to the marketing and branding of two of Portage’s biggest exports and employers.

“It’s about time the city got behind the producers and processors,” PP-OMG President Harv Kroeker said.  “We support the oat growers but let’s face it potatoes have way more wow factor and sex appeal.”

Civic leaders now have to weigh the options on the proposals and decide if it is worth the considerable time and money associated with the name change and decide which is best.

“Oats are a much healthier option,” oat farmer Pete MacGregor said.  “A healthy lifestyle is the new sexy and oats are leading the way.”

Oat production and processing is a vibrant and important part of Portage’s economy and changing the name of the city would help solidify it as the capital of oat production

Portage is also one of the biggest producers of fries in the world so the swap to Potato la Prairie would crown it the king of spuds.

CIPP-TV hit the streets of Portage to see what the person on the street thought.

“I don’t like porridge but I like oatmeal cookies,” Angela Watson said.  “Can we call it Cookie la Prairie?’

“Half this town is fried twenty-five per cent of the time,” Billy Neepawa offered.  “Potato la Prairie is the dumbest thing I’ve heard of and Porridge la Prairie is even stupider.”

“This sounds like a made up news story,” Tracey Smoke said.  “Like something from one of those satire sites.  I don’t think it’s real.”

Lyall Jones doesn’t like any of the options.  “Porridge, Portage, Potato, they’re all stupid.  Let’s just call it Prairie and be done with it.”

Notice to readers/disclaimer that explains the fictional, satirical and disturbing nature of this story.

Photo: Simon  James – https://www.flickr.com/photos/bearpark/

Jets to Adopt Name & Winning Tradition of Portage Terriers – Portage Now Ruff Riders

Winnipeg, MB –

The Winnipeg Jets made a splash before free agent frenzy by taking the whole organization in a new, winning direction.

After years of the Jets 2.0 repeating the same history as the NHL Jets 1.0, True North decided it was time for a big change in hopes of improving their fate.

Switching the name of a professional sports team is a serious endeavour, but the Jets only had to look west down the Trans Canada Highway to Portage la Prairie for inspiration – and a name.

Starting next season, the Winnipeg Jets will be known as the Winnipeg Terriers, taking on the name and logo of the provinces most winning hockey team of the last two decades.

While the Jets moniker had nostalgic value, the name seemed to be cursed, with the team never achieving any playoff success.  The Terrier brand comes with an aura of a champion and implies hockey excellence that will hopefully transfer into the big league.

Now without a name, the Portage junior hockey team, and reigning league champion, is considering taking on a traditional football name, the Ruff Riders.  The switch to the Ruff Riders tag would fit nicely with the green and white colour scheme of the team and the tradition of solid fan support.  Portage la Prairie’s main street is also named Saskatchewan Avenue.  The use of “Ruff” is a tie-in to the terrier dog of the past and will be worked into the new logo.

Reports suggest the Winnipeg Jets were also considering the Wheat Kings name as an option but felt the Terrier brand had a bigger cache and there was a conflict with the NHL Los Angeles Kings.

We will have more information on the updated jerseys of both teams as it is available.

 

notice to readers/disclaimer.

Photo: Braydon M: https://www.flickr.com/photos/bmusick1/