CIPP TV

Portage Makes History Electing First Imaginary Candidate, Ryan Coke, As Mayor

Ryan Coke becomes Portage la Prairie's first imaginary mayor in stunning landslide

PORTAGE la PRAIRIE – Portage is getting drunk on Ryan Coke and celebrating its first imaginary Mayor. The City of Portage la Prairie becomes the first municipality in Canada to elect a fictional character as mayor. After leveraging his substantial fictional media empire, including Portage’s imaginary and [...]

Man Decides To Run For Mayor Based On Number Of Facebook Friends & Marginal Ideas

Ryan Coke wants to be the next Mayor of Portage la Prairie by ending homeliness

PORTAGE la PRAIRIE, MB – The only thing that can help Portage look better is Ryan Coke. Media Mogul, trust fund kid and now political juggernaut, Ryan Coke has announced he is entering the race to become Portage la Prairie’s next top mayor. “I’m running on a platform that “Portage Needs Coke” because I [...]

Poll Reveals Most Millennials Oblivious Of Time Change Due To Reliance On Smart Phones

Millennials unaware of time change due to dependence on smart phones

PORTAGE la PRAIRIE, MB – A recent C.I.P.P. – TV poll indicates most people under 35 were not aware a change to Daylight Saving Time occurred this weekend. “The poll we conducted shows 85% of millennials did not realize a change in time happened this weekend,” C.I.P.P.-TV head researcher Robin Harrisburg [...]

Local Man Proud Of Ability To Call BS On Stories From Satire Sites

Man is proud of ability to know when satire stories are full of BS

PORTAGE la PRAIRIE, MB – Larry Houle has quite the nose for BS and he is not afraid to tell you about it. The 45-year-old Portager has gained notoriety in coffee shop circles and on social media for calling out false news. “I don’t like it when people get tricked with all the misinformation out there,” [...]

Couple Use 28 Days Of Month Long Netflix Free Trial To Decide What To Watch

Deciding what to watch on Netflix is difficult for Portage la Prairie couple

PORTAGE la PRAIRIE, MB – A struggle most couples endure on a nightly basis was taken to the extreme by Barry and Darlene Compton of Portage la Prairie as they spent 28 days trying to figure out what to watch on Netflix. “All our friends have Netflix so we decided to sign up for the free month,” Darlene Compton [...]

Producers of Suits Announce Spinoff Called “Safety Vests” Starring Meghan Markle

Producers of TV hit series Suits create spinoff series based on construction workers called Safety Vests starring Meghan Markle

HOLLYWOOD, CA & PORTAGE la PRAIRIE, MB – Producers of the hit TV drama suits announced they are collaborating with C.I.P.P. –TV to create a new drama series based on the people who wear orange, high-visibility safety clothing “Safety Vests” will tell the stories of intrigue and excitement from the [...]

Junior B Hockey Team Tries To Win Game By Running Opposition Goalie When Down By 9

Junior B team tries to run goalie after getting down by 9

ST. CLAUDE, MB – The St. Claude Voyageurs of the Manitoba Junior B Hockey League sent a strong and clear message last night in a game they lost 11-1 to the Roland Pumpkin Express. With only three minutes left in the second period Pumpkin Express forward and captain Gord Klassen rifled a shot past St. Claude goalie [...]

Local Fictional TV Station C.I.P.P. Celebrates International Skeptics Day With Doubtful Promotion & Programming Lineup

CIPP -TV Channel 116 plans International Skeptics Day marathon of programs

PORTAGE LA PRAIRIE, MB – Hit local imaginary TV station C.I.P.P. is celebrating a dubious holiday with a special programming schedule in honour of International Skeptics Day Saturday January 13. “Based on the fact we are a fictional and questionable television station that exists only on the internet we felt [...]

C.I.P.P.-TV Wins National Award For Pandering News Coverage Of Local Non-Accomplishments

PORTAGE LA PRAIRIE, MB – Popular local TV station C.I.P.P. was winner of a prestigious national award from the CRTC for excellence in news and information gathering. The annual For The People Award was presented to station owner and general pain in the ass Ryan Coke last night at a gala in Ottawa. “It’s an [...]

Portagers Have Fun With Foul Smell From Waste Water Treatment Facility

Billy Neepawa pretends to have diarrhea to play trick on neighbour

PORTAGE LA PRAIRIE, MB – As the south wind carries the tantalizing odour of feces from 13,000 Portage la Prairie arses across the city, some people complain about the unpleasant smell while many more Portagers made the choice to have some fun with it. Billy Neepawa noticed the smell while walking his mother’s cat [...]

CIPPTV Channel 116

Portage la Prairie's Fictional Satire Station