Portage la Prairie, MB –
Evangelicals around the world are amazed and bewildered at the recent double conversion of a local pro-life leader and her pro-choice counterpart on the same day.
Karen Waldenflugen has been a pro-life advocate for over 25 years and Lisa McLaren has been promoting feminism and the pro-choice perspective for as long as she can remember.
Both women’s stances suddenly flipped when the two local community activists got into a heated online discussion about recent vaccine mandates.
“Lisa was being super annoying saying the unvaxxed should be fined. I told her ‘my body, my choice,” former pro-lifer Karen Waldenflugen said. “The government shouldn’t be telling people what they should do to their bodies. Sure a lot of people might die because they’re not vaccinated but freedom is way more important than life.”
The previously pro-choice Lisa McLaren had some choice words for her counterpart.
“Karen was being such a Karen by not seeing how dumb not getting vaxxed is. I told her the government should throw her in jail if she refused the vaccine.”
It wasn’t until an interested third party weighed in and pointed out how the two had opposite views on abortion.
“This whole vaccine thing has awakened me and I believe the government has no place in dictating medical decisions,” Waldenflugen shared. “Ya, I used to believe that the government should make abortions illegal but now I realize how dangerous it is to take away people’s rights. Nobody should be able to take away my choice and freedom. I’d rather die.”
Former pro-choice activist Lisa McLaren similarly switched positions.
“I used to be all about letting people have the right to decide what is done to their body,” McLaren offered. “But this pandemic and these stupid anti-vaxxers made me realize how important it is to have a powerful government that can force people to do what is right. It’s about making the country safe for all of us. People are obviously too dumb and uninformed to make these decisions themselves.”
Both women have rescinded their memberships in the local pro-life and pro-choice groups sighting lack of support from the groups for their views on vaccines.
Waldenflugen and McLaren both vow to continue their efforts to convert others to their viewpoint online through multiple social media posts a day, nauseating memes and anger laced comments on news stories and posts opposed to their view.
It is unlikely the new converts will be very successful in their evangelism efforts but it is certain they will have fewer friends as a result.
Notice to reader – this is satire. Click here to read full disclaimer if you do not grasp the fictional nature of this story and website. If you thought for a moment this could be true then that might be funnier than the story itself. It is impossible for most people to see the fallacy of their poorly thought out political and social stances. Extremism if blinding whether it comes from the left or the right and for mankind to move forward moderate and progressive perspectives must prevail. There you have it an opinion piece buried within the disclaimer no one will every read. Give yourself 20,000 bonus points for getting this far. Points are non-redeemable and non-transferable and hold no value at all. God save the Queen!
Photo Credit: K. Ausburn – https://flickr.com/photos/treslola/7918092548/in/photolist-d4Gi43-pqCwjj-pqoG5D-2e3mFL-4ngSvM-KpNXNp-9tCj17-bY5CAw-4x8p5u-9tCcMu-9tCjsS-9tCfdj-9tzj1F-9tzdN2-9tzefx-9tzeTX-9tCfTb-9mf63z-9tCdAQ-9tCdeu-9tzkyF-9tCh8u-9tCeNw-9tCefu-2jYz2vm-25v6tTj-abx39N-4PHGEv-GNGGxA-4PHGBV-4PHGtD-9tCcsb-9tzmoB-9tCgzS-5rKLkS-9merRn-bjvNyP-bjvNDH-7xYTDm-8U1GK3-7xV3YB-4PMXLf-7xYTuo-4PMYeN-oi69ru-4PMXHC-EAmnKs-4PHGRH-4PHFFz-26wViSA