PORTAGE la PRAIRIE, MB – It was Bruce Erikson’s first and last Zoom meeting but he left an impression his coworkers will not soon be able to erase.

On Tuesday, Erikson received an email invite with the Zoom meeting link while “working from home” on his comfy sofa.  

“I was kind of pumped,” Erikson said.  “It was my first Zoom meeting ever.  I used to work at the gas station and this is my first grown-up job and I heard they did stuff like this.”

After doing an internet search on how to best work from home, Erikson took the bad advice of working “commando” rather than wearing business attire.  He also read that many people on conference calls liked to do crude or sometimes sexual things.

“I honestly just woke up like two minutes before the meeting and fired up my new company laptop and plopped on the sofa,” Erikson said.  “My wife was in the shower because she is also working from home.”

The 10am Zoom meeting started a little late and one of the early arrivals to the meeting sent Erikson a message to tilt his screen up a little.  “I thought, that was weird but I did it anyway.”  The employee was attempting to politely inform Erikson his genitals were visible on screen but Erikson remained oblivious.

“I noticed there was a whole bunch of faces pop up on my screen but I just thought they were the ones going to talk.”

His inability to grasp the technology was matched by his boss’ lack of awareness as the presentation went on for twenty minutes before the CEO caught sight of what was happening in front of Erikson’s computer.

Initially, most participants saw only his naked upper body but shortly after Erikson’s wife came out of the shower he placed the laptop on the coffee table revealing himself from the knees up.

“Since it was my first call I was kind of excited and frisky.  The meeting was pretty boring so I convinced my wife Sheelah to come make out a bit.”

The Erikson’s put on quite a show with Bruce wearing nothing but a smile and Sheelah in only a towel.  Employees of Sharpstone Enterprises Incorporated were treated to a jarring glimpse into the Eriksons’ love life.

“I guess I got fired because they could see my buffalo soldier for most of the call,” Erikson explained.  “I guess my video box was right next to the boss’ so that kind of sucked.”

Sharpstone declined to comment on the incident but did confirm that Erikson was no longer employed with the company.  Staff said off the record, it was the best Zoom meeting in company history and are sad to see Erikson go.

Erikson has already landed a new position and is trying to put the incident behind him.

“Like seriously, after a few hours of unemployment I got a text for another job.  It’s some kind of website or internet company, not sure what they do.  I didn’t even have to apply because they said they saw a video of me and offered me a job right away.”

He starts immediately and can continue working from home, although he is unsure of the details of his new work.  His new company is sending out a new laptop and he is excited about his new opportunity.

“This working from home is turning out to be pretty cool.  It’s way better than pumping gas.”

Photo credit – Britt Selvitelle

Notice to readers – click here to read the full disclaimer and legal statements. Please be your computer may have a camera and microphone that can record you right now.  The content of this and other stories on this website are based on fiction and the imagination of humans.  We are not recording you right now but that could be quite funny.  Maybe that should be another website our company sets up.  No, wait, our lawyers have said that is a bad idea. Consumption of this and other stories may cause dizziness, dry mouth, facial blemishes, hives, and thin hair. Should you experience an erection lasting more than four hours please seek medical treatment. This corporation assumes no responsibility for your grasp on reality, ability to tolerate sarcasm, humour and mocking comments. In addition they assume no responsibility for any resulting effects from digesting the content in this and other posts relating to but not limited to the aforementioned website and ancillary media products and modes of transportation. Please read and discuss at your own risk and with great caution. Should you feel nauseous at any point while reading this content please glance away from the screen or leave the website, social media or print page and the feeling should pass. This offer is not valid with any other offer and carries no cash or other value not to mention merit. Drive safe and drink responsibly, always consume in moderation. Don’t date your sister. We like oatmeal and beans. Never open your doors to strangers with weapons or offer rides to same. Please no parking without a permit. And yes, objects are larger than they appear in mirrors – unless the mirrors cause magnification in which case the object would be smaller in reality. Please consult a physician before working out. Dad?