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Portage Welcomes Winnipeg Migrants Fleeing Canada’s Most Dangerous City With Free Housing & Support

Portage la Prairie, MB – 

Winnipeggers are fleeing big city problems for small town paradise in record numbers.

Recently, Winnipeg was identified as the most dangerous city in Canada and the news is impacting it’s citizens.

“We just want to get away from all the violence and insanity,” Winnipeg migrant Normand Vincent said.  “Portage is so close and so perfect.  We just had to move here.”

Vincent is part of a wave of thousands of people who are fleeing crime, congestion and the burdens of big city life for the pastoral existence in Portage.

“Portage is ready to welcome all those looking to escape fear and anxiety,” city spokesperson Anita Roswell said.  “Our doors are open.”

With virtually no crime, no social issues and the promise of better life, Portage is becoming a beacon to those fleeing Canada’s most dangerous city.

“It’s amazing that less than an hour down the highway you can find heaven in the real world,” asylum seeker Brenda Gobell said.  “The shores of Crescent Lake are so inviting.  It is so peaceful here.  It’s so much different from Winnipeg.”

While Winnipeg has become a violent and dangerous place to live, Portage has become Canada’s model city with it’s friendly, warm and crime free culture.

The influx of migrants from Winnipeg has cause local officials to set up temporary accommodations until permanent, free housing can be built.

“All newcomers will be given free homes, jobs and social support to help them integrate into our culture,” Roswell explained.

With it’s abundant wealth and endless resources, Portage hopes to add up to 50,000 newcomers without any help from the federal or provincial government.

“Portage is extremely wealthy so increasing our population three or four times shouldn’t be a problem.” Roswell said.

“We love the generosity and help,” Gobell said.  “I don’t know why we didn’t move here sooner.  Portage is the perfect prairie town.”

Notice to readers/disclaimer – click here to read more if you do not understand this story and website are fictional and satirical.

Photo:Gene Bisbee – https://www.flickr.com/photos/77751108@N00/

2 Comments on Portage Welcomes Winnipeg Migrants Fleeing Canada’s Most Dangerous City With Free Housing & Support

  1. Why would you promote Winnipeg as being such a nasty place? Sad when even the smaller community news outlets use sensationalism to promote their stories! Disappointed!

    Like

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