Husband Guilty Of Oral Neglect – Wife Finds Love & Satisfaction With Wooden Teeth & Bolivian Mennonite

Portage la Prairie, MB – 

He was her husband and her dentist but he is now neither.

Joshua Bobinsky is facing a hefty divorce settlement, fines and professional discipline after neglecting the oral needs of his wife Jocelyn.

In February of last year, Mrs. Bobinsky entered the care of her husband of 20 years and dentist for the last 5, for a routine filling and root canal.  She was expecting to be back to normal the next day.

“He was always a kind and caring husband so I thought that he would make a good dentist,” the soon to be former, Mrs. Bobinsky said.  “No woman could stay with a man who is that bad at his day job.  After the terrible job he did on my dentures I couldn’t be with him anymore.”

After having to pull all his wife’s teeth, Mr. Bobinsky did such terrible job designing and fitting her dentures she was unable to eat, talk or smile.  The authorities became involved after Mrs. Bobinsky was mocked publicly during a recent Glesby Centre concert.

“People started pointing at me,” Bobinsky explained.  “My teeth kept falling out of my mouth and when I got them to stay in they made fun of my smile.  A couple we’ve known for fifteen years called me “Giraffe Face” over and over.”

Police were called to the centre to examine the botched false teeth and immediately apprehended Mr. Bobinsky and charged him with the oral neglect of his wife.

After initially pleading not guilty, Bobinsky, entered into a plea bargain and accepted the charges and was sentenced to a $10,000 fine and time served.  He is currently suspended from dentistry until he improves his skills as a denturist and finds a new wife.

Jocelyn Bobinsky has since sought the oral satisfaction of a denturist in Winkler Manitoba who creates life-like and award-winning dentures from hard wood.  His innovative work employs Mennonite carvers from Bolivia.  The Bolivians are old order Mennonites who have come to Canada to escape the wild and sinful life of their homeland.

“The work of these artists took my breath away,” Mrs. Bobinsky said.  “When I saw the work they did all I could say was wow!  All my friends compliment me now.  No one can tell they are made of wood.”

The Bobinsky’s are finalizing their divorce and Mrs. Bobinsky has started dating one of the Bolivian Mennonite artisans.  “I never want to suffer from oral neglect again and I know Abe(Sawatzky) will always make sure I am orally satisfied.”

More on this story as details become available.

Notice to readers/disclaimer about the humorous intentions, satirical nature and fictional reality of this story and website.

Photo: Rolands Lakis -