Portage la Prairie, MB –

Porridge, you’re mom made you eat it when your were a kid, and now the oat industry in Manitoba want to make Portagers call it their hometown.

Likewise, if the Potato Producers of Manitoba Group get their way, Portage will be named after the world’s sexiest vegetable.

The competing proposals put forward at City Hall to have the city re-named to Porridge or Potato la Prairie will offer a boost to the marketing and branding of two of Portage’s biggest exports and employers.

“It’s about time the city got behind the producers and processors,” PP-OMG President Harv Kroeker said.  “We support the oat growers but let’s face it potatoes have way more wow factor and sex appeal.”

Civic leaders now have to weigh the options on the proposals and decide if it is worth the considerable time and money associated with the name change and decide which is best.

“Oats are a much healthier option,” oat farmer Pete MacGregor said.  “A healthy lifestyle is the new sexy and oats are leading the way.”

Oat production and processing is a vibrant and important part of Portage’s economy and changing the name of the city would help solidify it as the capital of oat production

Portage is also one of the biggest producers of fries in the world so the swap to Potato la Prairie would crown it the king of spuds.

CIPP-TV hit the streets of Portage to see what the person on the street thought.

“I don’t like porridge but I like oatmeal cookies,” Angela Watson said.  “Can we call it Cookie la Prairie?’

“Half this town is fried twenty-five per cent of the time,” Billy Neepawa offered.  “Potato la Prairie is the dumbest thing I’ve heard of and Porridge la Prairie is even stupider.”

“This sounds like a made up news story,” Tracey Smoke said.  “Like something from one of those satire sites.  I don’t think it’s real.”

Lyall Jones doesn’t like any of the options.  “Porridge, Portage, Potato, they’re all stupid.  Let’s just call it Prairie and be done with it.”

Notice to readers/disclaimer that explains the fictional, satirical and disturbing nature of this story.

Photo: Simon  James – https://www.flickr.com/photos/bearpark/